Grief and Weight Loss

Hello... I lost about 20 lbs in the last year or so... Probably a little longer. I was about 140 lbs, 65", so it was a substantial weight loss. Some people at work were worried. I lost my appetite... Still there. If someone puts food in front of me, I will eat some but I can still go for entire day without eating nor wanting to eat.

I went to the doctor and they ran all sorts of tests on me, so there is nothing physically wrong with me.

But, once the referral was made to a psychotherapist, he told me I have grief and I have to cook my own food - that was my therapy.

I cannot bring myself to buy groceries... it's too much work. I live mostly of teas with milk, a few or several mochas, and at night will do hot water with honey and a dash of milk.

While I have not gained, at least I have not lost weight.

Sometimes I notice my heart racing. Last night I did not sleep at all and was so hot I was sweating almost all night. All I ate was a sandwich in the morning.

My family (siblings, mother) don't ever check on me. At work, no one cares - constant needs and unwarranted criticism, which is leading many to leave. I put my cat to sleep about a year ago - he was 16.

I feel so alone... I feel like no one cares and if I went away, my family wouldn't notice and at work, someone may be looking at the opportunity to take my job. When I go home, it's empty.

I got divorced because I wanted peace at home, and don't regret it.

When does grief subside or get better? I'm really, really tired. To the point of I want to give up.